Sun, 23
13 °C
Mon, 24
11 °C
Tue, 25
8 °C

LETTER: Lord Buckethead thanks the people of Maidenhead

Lord Buckethead

Lord Buckethead

LETTER: Lord Buckethead thanks the people of Maidenhead

Lord Buckethead fever has swept the nation after the space lord's memorable election campaign. The Maidenhead candidate has become something of a celebrity, amassing more than 100,000 followers on Twitter and flying to New York to appear on Last Week Tonight. A week on from the election, we got in touch with Lord Buckethead to get his thoughts about his campaign, and he took time out of his busy schedule to send us this response:

Dear Maidenhead Advertiser, what are my thoughts?

An intergalactic space lord I might be, but I have been humbled by the warmth that I have been shown by the people of Maidenhead, both before and after that tumultuous night in the Magnet Leisure Centre last Thursday.

I owe a tremendous debt of gratitude to the 249 pioneering democrats who voted for me and my progressive manifesto, and to everyone who was so friendly and generous during the campaign.

Maidenhead will always have a place in my internal-bodily-fluid-pumping organ.

I would also like to thank your Prime Minister, because on what must have been a highly stressful occasion for any leader she took the time to be cordial and polite both to me and the other candidates before the results were read out.

If she chose to be less polite with whoever advised her to call the election in the first place I would support her in that decision 100%.

That said, you ask me for my view on Mrs May's new government and it is quite simple: it is doomed.

I fear that in time, the recent ability of your Liberal Democrats to maintain a coalition for five of your Earth years will be seen as a rare and remarkable achievement. They remain electorally decimated as a result, but that's the way the asteroid crumbles.

As for me, I have matters to attend to. I have heard rumour of some particularly querulous Gremloids agitating on Sigma VIII and they will need to be promptly nipped in the bud. Even so, have no fear, Maidonians. If Britain calls, a space lord will answer. I stand by my manifesto, I stand ready to serve (and be served), and I will not rest until Ceefax is back.

Galactic best wishes, LB


Leave your comment

Share your opinions on

Characters left: 1500

Paid Stories

Most read

Top Ten Articles